We here at Bazilians want you to know how much the restaurant appreciates your continued patronage through the recent troubled times. Our manager has gotten out of, well, hmmm, how do we put this delicately? Out of the, uhh, slammer, and looks like being exonerated of the 1st degree felony charge. We did have to pay heavy fines on the malpractice charges and the assault and battery, but it will all "simmer down" eventually.
On other fronts, we are rebuilding rapidly since our little "incident", and have now restored about 2/3 of the menu. Just at the moment we have to print them on lead foil (talk about "hot" type), but they seem to be readable, if you hold them up to the light at the right angle. The radiation level in the kitchen is getting down to the point where we can send decontamination crews in there on 2-hour shifts now, if they wear protective garments. Please remember to pick up your scintillator badges at the door when you enter the restaurant. Proper safety is EVERYONE's responsibility!
You may experience occasional delays between ordering your food and being eaten by it, so keep a happy grin on, enjoy the Cerenkov Lighting System, remember not to drink too much of the water, and...
Just when you thought it might remotely conceivably be safe to swim in that pool, there's some goddam reactor sitting at the bottom of it, making nasty faces at itself and humming La Marseillaise. (Here at Bazilians, we are more frequently found gumming La Mayonnaise, but that's another issue. Waiter! Another round of Marmite floats for everyone, with extra melted butter. Use the good muffins and the Schweppes Club Soda.)
Pumpkin Central announces:
The Saturday Night Feast of the Exploding Bazilian
to take place on SATURDAY, MARCH 31st, 1990, at NOON
Where: (out-of-date address deleted)
RSVP: PLEASE! We'd love to hear from you. Mr. Bazilian, his aunt, and all the little Bazilians (and there are Bazilians of them, heh heh) are sitting here by the phones, FAX machines, and terminals, waiting for YOUR CALL OR EMAIL.